"i have to run"

i have to run i have to run
i have to run until i wail
i have to run until my beating footsteps punch out the entire works of Shakespeare in Morse code
i have to run until my swinging arms pop out of my shoulders like a sputnik into the sky
i have to run until i drown off my pouring sweat and tears
i have to run until my clothes shed me naked against the wind
i have to run until my shadow gives up the chase
i have to run until i convince the Earth to spin the other way for me
i have to run
i have to run

even though i really don't know
if anyone
is waiting for me
but i have to run until i find out

i can't be far off

i need to run
i need to run

I started reading Jack Kerouac again. I don't know how long it'll last. I'm not a big fan of his writing. Just his energy. I remember in high school, I felt like I needed to run. I needed to run until I collapsed. I was never really good at sports. I had two left feet, two left arms, and two left brains. I couldn't catch, I couldn't pass, I coudn't dribble, I couldn't tackle, I couldn't leap. The only thing I could do was run. So I did cross country. In corss country, you don't learn how to run. You learn something else. While running for awhile, you reach a point where you forget the pain in your legs...the thirst in your throat... and you're left alone with your mind. You just follow the motions and you convince yourself that you're flying. I had to know how far I could go. How far my body could take me.

But I still don't know.

i need to run